We Got a Mutha’ F**king Blimp, Yo!

If you subscribe to the theory that a city’s coolness is directly proportional to the sheer variety of vehicular transportation options, then San Francisco is the baddest town of them all! In addition to a mind numbing variety of public transportation options (ranging from the confusing to the infuriating to the downright adorable), enterprising San Franciscans have demonstrated capitalistic genius shuttling tourons around this fair “city”.

Let’s start with the relatively cool column:

1) You can take a blimp tour in San Francisco.

Zeppelin

Our Zeppelin is Bigger than Yours

Actually, it’s a Zeppelin (metal frame), not a blimp (giant balloon) and Airship Ventures has the only one in the country. It ostensibly filled with non-flammable helium so chances of a mid-flight explosion are dramatically reduced. While it ain’t cheap (prices start at $495 per person), it’s a bargain when you consider Goodyear doesn’t even offer private citizens aerial tours of the Brooklyn Bridge.

OK, now that we’ve exhausted to the cool column, let’s look at the lame transportation offerings:
Seriously, if you have any self esteem whatsoever do not sign-up for these “city” tours:

1) Lame car-like things with obnoxiously loud GPS-guided tour

Loud and lame

Loud and lame

2) The 1990’s called and it wants its Segway back

Seglame

Seglame

3) What the quack?

Lame on land AND sea!

Lame on land AND sea!

4) Celebrating San Francisco’s… fire engine heritage?

Put on the lame siren!

Put on the lame siren!

Weird.

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About adamahata

On February 5, 2008, after 15 amazing years in New York City, I got married, changed careers, and moved out to San Francisco. All within a three-week period, and with very little preparation. This blog is for those of you who follow me out to San Francisco (or have been here for a while and are still trying to figure this place out). You're not in Kansas anymore Dorothy.
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